Jump to content


We Need School Support....

  • Please log in to reply
4 replies to this topic

#1 tracky2


    Old as the hills

  • ASDf Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 167 posts
  • Gender:Female

Posted 04 May 2017 - 08:47 AM

Hi I appear to be Mrs frustrated again .... oh and it couldn't possibly be with school, could it 😉 (She says tongue firmly in cheek).

School have ruled out ASD apparently a joint decision between them and educational psychologist, educational psychologist chologist never met with L but a a questionairevwas completed anyway and it was determined no they were not string any traits..... grrr.

Luckily paediatrician has decided to seek another opinion and wishes to continue the path off possible diagnosis.

The problem I have now is to have school recognise L still needs support. We have a very basic school action plan that I believe isn't being followed as L looks like he is coping.

Yet we are having anxiety over school at home. Sore stomachs trying to get off school saying he's unwell etc.

L finally spoke some to us last night and it appears that L is struggling with the expectations off having to be good and do the right thing all the time. one if Ls anxieties is doing things wrong and getting in to trouble apparently there was a mix up that resulted in him getting 10 mins reduction in golden time ( I'm not sure on the details of this could be that he did get in to a bit off trouble but Logan doesn't see it that way).

This conversation led on to other things like how he gets tired and muddled by the end of the day and how had it is for him to do everything and be good and do what's asked if him all the time. I could have cried for him he's only 8 and feeling such expectations already.

I told him that when he feels like this he has to tell the teacher that there's things that they can do to support him like some quiet time, extra support to lay out work, ear defenders, brain breaks etc. It's all in his plan. He then said the ear defenders have gone missing for ages.

I'm going to write a letter to the teacher and ask that we communicate n his diary that she hasn't out in this term. I hadn't needed to write in it till now, typical. We should also be looking at his review for action plan if I remember the date properly. Think I'll try and pull it early doubt it though....

He's also worrying about moving in to p5 as the expectations have risen, I need to know when they are planning on transitioning L because he's not coping with the thought of it very well.

What do you do when everything they're telling you is token gestures because they don't believe anything is wrong.

Asd or not it is obviously anxiety I just need them to understand what they see is classic masking with L and not necessarily what he's all about.

Sorry for grumbling about same subject all the time,


#2 Kadenza


    Under the table

  • The Moderators
  • 4,465 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Oh, I don't know. Somewhere around and about.

Posted 04 May 2017 - 02:27 PM

It sounds like you're doing everything right.  Keep documenting it all in case you need a paper trail at some point, and keep gently (hah!) reminding school that they have a responsibility to give all children equality of opportunity, which means responding to their needs, and not necessarily to a named diagnosis.  xx

  • imperfect parent and bluewater like this

#3 bluewater


    Old as the hills

  • ASDf Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 328 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Scotland
  • Interests:Outdoor activities

Posted 05 May 2017 - 08:19 PM

Hi Tracky,


How frustrating.


It seems that children often try to do things right at school, and often school doesn't realise what an effort that is (certainly that was the case for ds1 who used to hold it together until out of the school gate. I'm not sure the primary school ever really recognised that).


In theory, you should be getting any support needed, regardless of whether there is dx (Education Scotland act 2004 + amendments 2009). I'm not sure what happens if the school doesn't recognise any additional support needs, but I think I might phone the Enquire helpline: http://enquire.org.uk/, as they are specifically for information on ASN in Scotland and will know about parents rights, pathways to follow and any support organisations. We've also written direct to the education authority in the past


It's good that your paediatrician is still open. Here, dx is now between paediatrician and SALT. When ds1 was dxd it included an EP. Interestingly, the EP was the one of the three professionals least certain - he had also only seen ds1 in school... fitting in....

  • imperfect parent likes this

#4 imperfect parent

imperfect parent

    How many posts? Get a life!

  • ASDf Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 5,987 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Interests:horse riding, reading, baking and SEN issues

Posted 06 May 2017 - 07:06 PM

L has described what troubles him really well.  It may be useful to write it out, along with the questions/prompts which enabled him to tell you, Keep a record of his views as well as yours.

  • bluewater likes this

#5 tracky2


    Old as the hills

  • ASDf Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 167 posts
  • Gender:Female

Posted 14 May 2017 - 08:34 PM

Well I ended up writing a detailed letter to the teacher. Who took time to speak with Logan and support him, she even gave him back his golden time.

I received back a letter in his communication diary, started off really well sounding good even spoke about the use of a social story for the transition to primary 5 it became generic. I asked politely if it was possible to implament his action plan guidelines in the afternoon as he's clearly stating he's becoming tired with the effort and becoming muddled causing him anxiety so having quiet area to complete work, have any work mapped out for him etc where he may struggle, have extra time to complete tasks etc.

Her reply to this was that 'all children'got tired in the afternoons and was completely normal and she recognised this therefore given extra time etc to those that need it that he ear defenders were available to 'all children'that may require the use of them.

Is it just me taking this the wrong way but it made me really angry. I don't care one hoot about 'all children' I'm telling her my child is struggling.

I do not see the point in conversations with the school as they clearly think I'm 'that mum' you know paranoid and over protective over the silly things. I thought it was pretty significant what he said even if it was the loss off golden time that upset him enough to provoke the conversation. And yes he probably did manipulate the situation to his liking but at the end of the day he's telling people he's struggling

Since L has been off for a few days with a virus seems to have eliminated some of his anxiety and school seems fine again just now. Until, the next time though. I wonder what kind of teacher he'll get in primary 5, his teacher now is nice enough nut just new out of training and I think relying on others to guide her

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users