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Please Can We Have Pinned Home Ed Info


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#31 gingerpig

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 08:56 PM

Hi - I'm thinking about it and would welcome any feedback you have. We are pre-dx for D who is 4 on Thursday, but we're pretty sure she is HFA or thereabouts. What I'm finding is that her social schools at pre school are so much worse than when she is with me, and that also, what social skills she had before starting pre school are being eroded. The pre school are hoping to get her 1:1 support but honestly from a report they did for us to pass on to the CDC for her dx, she is really, really struggling. I find it so confusing as she is happy to go and seems to enjoy all the activities, and I know she's made at least one friend there, although her key worker thinks otherwise. We often walk home with D's friend and her mum tells me how much her daughter likes D so it's really confusing.

For whatever reasons (and I'm assuming its the social pressure) her learning has really slowed down too. I don't think she demonstrates any knowledge at pre school, but walking there she will read out numbers on bis and house, discuss what she's seeing and she's starting to get very keen at looking at letters at home. She even put t and o together today to make to, so she's on the brink of reading too.

Any thoughts? One thing that complicates matters for me is that D has a younger brother M who is 2 and who is very social and very demanding. So not sure how to give them both adequate time or if I would just end up home educating D or both of them or what.

#32 elemental

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Posted 27 March 2011 - 09:22 PM

I would advise you to contact 'education' otherwise' and get in contact with your local home ed group. You can then find out what is happening in your local area and possibly go to a group and talk to the people there. Then you will get a clearer picture on what is available locally for you.

I have home educated my two childre 6 and 10 with very different needs , for 3 and a half years. It is challenging and hard work but feel that are lives are more postive as a result.

#33 janetwinmum

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Posted 12 January 2012 - 09:57 AM

I am having real problems with O when he attends school and he's showing massive signs of stress and anxiety (as am I lol). I am also considering HE as a very real option for our family.

Books by John Holt are helpful a is 'Learning without school' by Ross Mountney. There are many facebook groups who are very supportive and once you contact a few parent's who home ed, either via something such as yahoo (look for groups near you), you find you uncover a world of similar families who come in all shapes and sizes.

The internet offers HE families a wealth of knowledge straight to their homes that is making the process easier than before. I am not saying this is an easy option for every family but you do have a choice.

Jane
x

#34 mel123

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Posted 13 January 2012 - 09:07 AM

there are yahoo groups for most areas - they are a brilliant place to start chating to people in your area and finding out what goes on. There is also a home ed special needs group

http://www.he-special.org.uk/ xx



#35 annie-rose

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Posted 14 January 2012 - 09:56 PM

having just started HE our daughter (age 5) sharing experiences will be really helpful, socialising at all does worry me a bit because she is so reluctant at the moment to go anywhere but perhaps that will change as she gets used to her new situation

#36 di30

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Posted 24 February 2012 - 07:41 PM

My son was in year 9 of secondary school when we taken him out.

We would be getting calls 3 to 4 times a week with problems of him hiding away in toilets etc and not attending lessons, despite him being moved to a support unit amongst the school.
After many meetings, and many arrangements nothing worked, and as he suffers high anxiety levels alongside Aspergers, it was not helping him at school at all. His IEP needs list was getting longer every few months review.

So we turned to HE, was lucky to have an uncle who is a retired teacher/head of year, also tutors - to help.

We did hear from the Ed dept about twice to ask for updates, such as would he be returning to school or continuing home ed, but no help offered from them.

#37 Jolly Roger

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Posted 28 December 2013 - 03:31 PM

Well, that was interesting.

I've just had a chat with a few home educators on Twitter (you can see it on the ASDf Twitter account.)

It started because one of them was given a recommendation to look at ASDf for autism-specific resources and support - but felt put off because she read some criticism of home schooling here. That, I think, is fair enough, because there has been some criticism of home schooling here, as well as a significant amount of support.

The fact that criticism exists at all was an insuperable problem. They wanted uncritical support - and nothing less. Sorry, but that is not available on ASDFriendly - members of this forum are entitled to disagree with each other.

What was interesting, however, was the way that the discussion moved on. Time and again, any attempt to defend the school system was interpreted as an attack on home education. No amount of agreement that the school system had its flaws was enough - any acknowledgement of its strengths was deemed as an "unfriendly" attack on home education and all those who supported it.

Their point that "some schools are incapable and some parents make better educators" was accepted - but my response that other schools do a good job was apparently a response too far. That, it seems, is an intolerable attack on home educators.

So I tried to compare like with like: what about, I asked, when home education fails as well? Even the Home Education Advisory Service acknowledges that "some negligent parents masquerade as home educators to avoid confrontation." And the NSPCC has concerns about the number of Serious Case Reviews into child abuse that have noted home education being used as a strategy for preventing child protection services from their jobs. (See the ASDf Twitter feed for the references.)

Yes, I knew that wouldn't go down well. But then being accused of attacking home educators when I was defending schools was pretty offensive, too.

There are thousands of good schools, tens of thousands of good teachers, and hundreds of thousands of children with SEN and mental health problems who are effectively supported and go on to thrive. If pointing that out makes a home educator feel under attack, then we are at an impasse.

To me, the way forward is to acknowledge what is good and effective in our school system, and use legislation and co-operation between parents and authorities to get it for every single child. That is what I believe in and it is what I do.

If home educators think that is an attack on them, that's their problem.

Gareth
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#38 maximus prime

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Posted 28 December 2013 - 06:11 PM

I have never wanted to home ed mainly because I believe the right school could do a better job than I could ever hope to do and I am fortunate that both Jack and Lucy's school demonstrate consistently that they are able to meet Jack and Lucy's needs very well indeed.

I fully acknowledge and appreciate that not all schools would be as competent or as determined to meet needs nor as willing to have me on board and to consider my involvement as vital but I took advantage of them having statements and so they didn't attend our catchment schools.

I don't really have any in depth knowledge of home ed children with ASD, I know of one boy who was dx'ed with Jack getting on for 16 years ago and never entered the school system. I've no idea whether he would have fared better in school but I'm always struck by the fact he's had no input from SALT or OT or any services and at nearly 20 there are no plans for his future which would scare me as a parent. If nothing else Jack being in school has kept him on the radar.

Just like schools I am sure there are very competent home edders in the same way I am equally sure there are some that aren't so good, it's a pity that discussion is inhibited because of blinkered views IMO .
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#39 Mozzy

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Posted 28 December 2013 - 07:05 PM

Things I think ALL kids need and sometimes ASD kids need them more...

 

  • to be bullied (not badly of course but we all learn from experiece)
  • to have to call someone miss, sir, ma'am, mr X, mrs Y etc (it helps group people and build a hierarchy, it teaches respect)
  • to fall out of a tree (everyone needs adventure and miss-haps just minor ones)
  • to be picked last AND to be picked first for a game
  • to be included in a "group" and to also be excluded it helps teach empathy and that life is not fair unless you make it fair
  • to mix with others their own age
  • to not always have someone, just for them to run to for help (it helps build problem solving skills)
  • to do things they do not want to do e.g. study a subject they are not keen or or do PE (we all have to do this as adults, lets start as kids)
  • to experience a variety of situations, emotions, people and activities (to show life has variety even if we don't like it all)
  • to follow rules that they may not understand, like in primary school you do not go on the field in winter (we all have rules all through life and some never make sense but most have a reason even if at the time we cannot see it)
  • to fail (in a controlled way and/or with support)
  • to achieve when they didn't think they could

Plus many other things thats just a start! But my point is I know all this can be achieved without a standard school setting via home ed and clubs etc but for someone to do ALL this in home ed alone is a massive task and it is very easy as a parent let alone as a home educator to have an "off day" or decide (even if it is due to sickness) to have a "day off". It is hard to be be a mum, teacher, supporter, someone who is loved and someone who is respected in a professional way all in one day.

 

I am an avid believer in school for ASD kids mainstream or specialist and I do believe there is a place for every kid out there that is right but if people chose to home educate that is their decision I just hope they manage to include all of the above.


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#40 Miss Mac

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 10:33 AM

I think HE when it works well, works very well. It would be a shame for one or two blinkered people with their own agenda to alienate other parents by their aggressive defence of HE.

 

Business as normal. I'm happy to provide 11-18 English resources for Home Edders, but I won't for individuals who are aggressive and rude.


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#41 Jolly Roger

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 10:37 AM

Thankfully, not all home-educators are like that.

You know how we occasionally bump into the militant arm of the Aspie Liberation Front? I think I met the home-ed equivalent yesterday.
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#42 lisac

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 01:44 PM

This is all very well and everyone has a point,  however the real life challenges are post 19 and 25! Happy days



#43 Jolly Roger

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 05:38 PM

This is all very well and everyone has a point,  however the real life challenges are post 19 and 25! Happy days


Yeah - people keep telling us that! *gulp*

LN is 13 and his next annual review is the Transitional Review - this is the one where we start planning for 19-25 and post 25. We've been warned that this will make every struggle for assessment, statementing, provision, respite and all that seem like a stroll in the park with ice-cream.

#44 Prosecco Queen

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 07:51 PM

Sadly my experiences of home ed are not that positive.... We get a lot of students coming to us at 16 because they, and parents, want them to get a recognised post 16 qualification ....for some it's A Levels, for others vocational..... The challenges for these young people, most of whom have SEN and I would say the majority ASD, of suddenly coming to a mainstream FE environment , with lots of other teenagers is massive , and in my experience the vast majority of these young people struggle massively...

For similar students in schools we are involved in transition reviews, transitions visits to college , taster days etc.... I have never had one home ed person contact us to discuss these things for their young person, they just apply ! So if you home ed my advise is think of the future.... At 14 start thinking about post 16.... If going to college is possibly an option , contact them , ask for their transitions worker or their ALS department .... Start having regular visits to the college , even if just for a coffee to start with....please don't just decide at 16 they need a qualification and pally to college , it doesn't work for the young people like that, in my experience!!!!
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#45 Mozzy

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Posted 30 December 2013 - 08:44 AM

Glad someone brought up transition, its a bugger!

 

I went through school to a Sixth Form and (by pure luck) it was only the second year the Sixth Form had been open so class sizes were very small and TA's were on hand plus of course I had a statement.

 

People still thought I needed qualifications, bits of paper (I already had a bunch of GCSE's) so I studied A' Levels, concrete subjects like math and the sciences with art thrown in as I could draw things put in front of me.

 

My Biology class had 4 students, me and 3 boys. 1 teacher and my TA. Apart from landing us all in hospital (left a couple of bottles of Ether open on a bench above a heater on a very cold day so heating was on high) it went ok, The 3 boys were total science wizz-kids so pretty much got on with things meaning if needed I had a TA and a teacher to help. It was an ideal class for me. So if you want to know which traits in fruit flies are dominant and recessive you have come to the right person... If you want to know how to by shopping (using real money not a debit card), calculate savings, budget and check you have the right change go some place else!

 

Life skills were something I never did really, I had help both in and out of school but no one dreamed of me being this independent so I was never taught and also no one really knew how!

 

So post A Levels I had pretty much nothing apart from a bunch of bits of paper saying I was smart but I was not life smart only school smart!

Supported living

Living with a friend

Day centres

Job

 

I'm lucky I had good friends and fell into a very supportive job. Without those I do not know where I would be at now! Transition in my case was never done well and that sets someone up to fail. Swapping one world (either way) so school and big situations to staying at home doing not much or being at home and having pretty much 1:1 all the time to moving to a education place or even a day centre with out proper transition only sets someone up to fail.

 

And yes post 16, 18, 25 etc the fight gets harder,

No grants, family fund etc

If you get support they take a % of your DLA towards it

The areas you can access decrease so your "allocation" of SaLT (if any) goes down, same with Psychology etc

The teams are different. No more Pead

Which social care team to put you under, most LD teams wont touch ASD unless the IQ is below 70 and not just the "functional IQ" so its a toss up of the adult aspergers service, mental health service, primary care (in my area anyway) and let me tell you, NONE of them want you and they ALL think you will be better with the other!!

And respite? What's that? And if you want overnight Ha! No no no its much better (they mean cheaper) for them to come and basically 'baby sit' the person while you go out! My local area when I was 20ish had at least 3 places adults could go for respite overnight, now we are down to one and it is always booked up well in advance.

Direct payments are fab IF you can get a good company or good PA's but it also puts the fight back into the hands of the parent or even the supported person. It is your job to arrange care, it is your job to cover sickness, it is your job to make sure you budget the payments to allow for emergencies or bank holidays (plus their increased rates). Commissioned care (that Social Services organise and pay direct) is good but the bidding on the tenders and the lower rate they pay to the companies mean you can get pushed from piller to post. If the company you are with this year is a "preferred provider" for the county and next year for whatever reason they are not then rates might increase and social services may refuse to fund that company who are now no longer a preferred provider. 

 

Transition is something that you need to on top of well in advance. And it really is beneficial to be known by the system prior to transition age. It is very hard for a parent who has been home educating their child since the age of 5 with no help and no contact really with social services at the age of 16 or 18 to ask for support work placements, day centres, access to support in a MS college because as far as anyone is concerned they have done years with no help, support, or anything (mums don't count as support there is no record or documentation) to then get it. So even if you home educate and do it really well, its always good to be known by others, to document things and have external help pre 16 so there is some paperwork and stuff to pass to the post 16 people!






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