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#1 Vodkalass

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Posted 16 February 2017 - 08:56 AM

T hasn't been in school since the middle of December, he threw a glass beaker at another students head. Thankfully he never marked him. He goes to a ASD school.Things had been escalating for a couple of months leading up to that...was convinced this student had called him names even though with a TA sat next to him said nothing was said.

 

School will not have him back & will not exclude him, they would rather work with the LEA......who have not done a thing even though according to the manager of the SEN team he was her priority at the last CIN meeting in January.

 

He has exams in May (GSCE) and has had no input. T is having real difficulties, he can explode at the simplest request, we have a lock on the kitchen so he can't get at the knives or food. He has shown serious sexual harmful behaviour, even asking his older gay brother for sex, put a coming out video on youtube saying he was interested in older men. Can't  understand that even if he consented it was against the law & they are bad men.

 

We are looking for residential & have found 1 for him. The LEA want him to go to a mainstream college in September even though his Psychotherapist has said he is too vunreable & if he found someone was gay he would be asking them for sex & if he got into a group who exploited him he would do anything they would suggest if it meant he got something out of it e.g Beat that lad up & we'll get you a dog....or worse he would do it no questions asked.

 

We know there is nowhere within the county for him but according to the LEA we still have to look at what is locally first.....I have done that, but that isn't good enough.

 

Having him home 24/7 is exhausting, draining and I am trying to keep it together because I am worried what the outcome would be if were to let go. He was up until half 4 this morning because he wanted his 3ds, hubby hasn't gone to work because he is exhausted.

 

Just feel like no-one is keeping us in the loop only found out the other day from his social worker that the next CIN meeting has been changed to an annual review of his EHCP. Sorry about rambling just getting so frustrated with everything.



#2 imperfect parent

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Posted 16 February 2017 - 01:34 PM

You need an interim review of his EHCP.  Meanwhile they should be providing education, but that can sometimes be worse than nothing.  I've found SOS SEN very helpful, as were IPSEA.  The LA should have an uphill battle to name mainstream if Specialist  cannot meet needs.  Try and take a step back and look at the situation logically and you will see that you have a better idea of what he needs than the LA who are essentially looking for the lowest cost solution.



#3 Vodkalass

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Posted 16 February 2017 - 04:46 PM

We are having a review on the first. Have since found out the manager of the SEND team has been on the phone to head teacher in the view of getting him back to school. HT has said no, cannot guarantee safety of students, staff or T if he came back. Cannot meet his needs. LEA are saying to him that it I a mental health issue not an educational issue.

The last meeting it was agreed with SEND & school he couldn't go back & that they would sort something. She has lied & will do whatever it takes to get him back there where it has already failed even though it will do more harm than good.

We have found a residential college.....initially looking for Sept post 16, but they can take from 15 & are willing to do so after everything has been assessed etc. Everyone is in agreement it is the best place except the LEA, who are stalling because they don't want to pay for it.

#4 mad cat lady

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Posted 16 February 2017 - 08:29 PM

When we were looking for a placement for J the LEA suggested a placement which was unsuitable so I phoned the school and talked at length with the Head and explained J's needs,vulnerabilities and that the specialist placement did not feel able to keep either him or other students safe.
Not surprisingly the LEA had not given them the full picture, once they knew they quickly decided they could not meet his needs.
It was a nice quick way of avoiding another battle with LEA.

#5 Vodkalass

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Posted 01 March 2017 - 02:18 PM

Just had another meeting, still no further forward. SEN reprisentative big announcement was that they were going to look into the tutoring service within 1 of the local community centres.....even though she mentioned this in the meeting back in January & dismissed it because he would need 2 to 1 & because of all the risks that he poses when out (which we all pointe out to her) :censored  :wall  Has anybody had any experience good or bad with using a tutor. Thanks



#6 imperfect parent

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Posted 01 March 2017 - 05:10 PM

We've had good and bad experience of a tutor :)

 

Because T is of statutory school age the LA have to provide him with education unless you choose to educate him (please don't unless it's what you really want to do).  Even if this is a mental health issue causing the difficulties they have to provide at least 5 hours of tuition, and  up to 15 hours depending on what he can cope with.  Start low and build is best.

 

You need the tutor to understand T's needs, and tuition needs to be in a suitable environment.  Stand firm on what you know he needs.

 

When DS1 was 12 he was considered violent by his school, but when it came to tuition they had a volunteer to act as LSA/second person who knew T and volunteered even though she was pregnant.  She said that she was confident that  he would behave well, and that she and the disabled tutor would be fine, and they were.  So much for the risk assessment suggesting that 2 person restraint might be necessary, neither the tutor nor the LSA were physically able even to attempt restraint :rolleyes:

 

The tutor that didn't work was lovely, but not confident and unable to support DS1, so while he met her he didn't talk to her.  At the moment we have a really good tutor who likes him, but has been given very limited hours.

 

Happy to answer any specific questions either on here or by PM






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